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5 Ways to Value a Youth Ministry Volunteer’s Time

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Your volunteers are busy people just like you.

They have families and jobs and their own relationships with God.

After juggling all of those things, they still manage to help you lead a thriving ministry.

My guess is you want them to continue to do that for quite some time.

The fastest way to drive away good volunteers is to waste their time. That's why you need to be intentional about making sure you don't.

1. Always start on time and always be totally prepared. One of your leaders didn't have time for dinner and cruised right past Chipotle because he didn't have time to stop. How is he going to feel if you aren't prepared to begin your meeting on time?

2. Don't meet if you don't have to. Could you have communicated your content in an email? Maybe shot a quick video with a webcam? If there's a way to do it without calling a meeting, then do it that way.

3. Meet one-on-one. I try to meet one-on-one with each of my volunteers at least once a year. I schedule dozens of 20-minute meetings, and communicate more in a small 20-minute meeting than I can in two hours with a large group.

If you really want to value a volunteer's time, meet them at the coffee shop near her house or workplace, not the one right by your office.

4. Cut way back on the emails. Your volunteers are probably wading through several messages from your church every week. There are a few ways to make sure that your important ones stand out as such, but the best way is to cut out unimportant messages altogether.

5. Find ways to make it easier for volunteers to do ministry. We want our volunteers to send postcards and letters to our students on a regular basis. In order to make it easier for them, we send over a sheet of address labels and pre-postaged envelopes.
There are dozens of ways to save your volunteers a few minutes here and there. The result? Happier volunteers and more ministry. What do you do to make sure you're respectful of your volunteers' time?

Aaron Helman is on a mission to help end the epidemic of youth worker burnout. He writes Smarter Youth Ministry to help youth workers with their biggest frustrations - things like leading volunteers. He is also the youth minister at Firehouse Youth Ministries in South Bend, Indiana.

 


Dealing with Disrespectful Teenagers

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Youth workers shouldn’t operate under the assumption that young people will automatically respect adults. Respect is so… yesterday.
Young people today call it “keeping it real.” They just say it how it is.
“This is boring.”
“Whatever, fat dude!”
“I’m outta here. This blows.”
So how can youth workers command respect in a world that is growingly disrespectful and rude?
Youth worker Laura, from Pennsylvania just asked me that same question a few weeks ago. Her ministry reaches to some church kids, but predominately unchurched kids. She quickly learned that respect was hard to come by, and talking with parents didn’t seem to help the problem, because in many cases… they were the problem!
This is a tough situation, and I can relate. I worked for a campus ministry a few years back with very few church kids, plenty of gangs and drugs… and very little parents that cared. I remember one of the first times I had to confront a kid. He ran off and told his dad that I threatened him. His dad assured me that if I did it again he would come over and “kick my…”
Nice, huh?
Discipline is one of those fine balances. If we're too lenient, teenagers will walk all over us. If we're too strict (especially with “hard” kids like this)… they'll just walk away.
The answer is tough love. It's love and grace, with clear boundaries.
ONE RULE
Youth workers always ask me, “What rules should we actually enforce in youth group?” I’ve seen them all. No cell phones. No PDA. No fun!
I don’t like getting caught up in a bunch of rules. I’ve always had a lotta luck saying it like this:
“I have one rule, and that is respect. I'm here for you guys. And I'm happy to give this time to you because I respect you. So I only expect one thing in return: respect. That means when you are here, you respect me, the other adults, each other, and the facility.” (purposely all-inclusive)
Then I always ask them for an agreement.
“Are you guys okay with that?”
Then, if a kid violates that, I pull them aside and say, “Chris, you looked me in the eyes and told me that you have no problem with my one rule: respect. What's going on?”
Then I listen.
AN EXCUSE FOR ONE-ON-ONE
Sometimes, if a kid is acting up, the best response is to just wait and endure his or her antics (to a point) that one evening, then pull the kid aside for a one-on-one time later in the week.
One-on-one correction is way better than public correction. Public correction can sometimes provoke a public retort, so a kid can save face in front of all his or her friends. So pull the kid aside when convenient and talk with them. Or even better…
“Taylor, let me take you to ice cream.”
This is a double bonus.
1. You get to spend some needed time with Taylor.
2. You can ask him for his help.
“Taylor, I need your help. I'm trying my best to provide some real and relevant help to young people. In order to do that, I can't be babysitting. You can help me by being a positive example and showing respect. Is that going to be a problem?”
And the “tough” part of this love is, if a kid, after all this, looks at you and says, “You can't make me leave!!!” Then you pull them aside and calmly tell them, “Sorry, you obviously aren't cool with our one rule, respect. So you need to spend a week at home. If, after a week, you're ready to show respect… then you're welcome to come back.” (You're making it clear that it is THEIR choice.)
Quick side note: I’m assuming you and the rest of your adults volunteer leaders are already spending time hanging out with your students outside of youth group. It would be a shame if only those who misbehave get to go to ice cream.
If it gets to the point of kicking a kid out, then you need to involve the parents.
PROACTIVE PARENTAL COMMUNICATION
Sadly, many youth workers don’t communicate with parents until a problem surfaces.
I’ve made that mistake. Morgan gets busted, and we call his parents for the first time… “Hi, I’ve never met you, and I haven’t felt the need to talk to you until now… now that I have to… so please don’t think I’m a tool!” (yeah… not a pretty phone call) And we wonder why parents get defensive?
Meet the parents before there is a problem. This is something I really emphasize in my “boundaries” chapter in my book CONNECT, simply because clear communication with parents will steer you from a world of trouble.
Once I’ve met parents, I don’t necessarily use my kids’ parents as a threatening tool—especially with unchurched kids. If you try the… “Be good or I'll tell your parents!” Many kids will respond, “Tell my parents! I don't' give a &$#@!!” (Because many of their parents don't.)
So I don’t run to parents every time a kid acts up. Parents might get defensive, immediately siding with their kid, while perhaps subconsciously considering your confrontation as an attack on their parenting ability.
So try pulling them aside and talking with them one-on-one first. If the bad behavior persists, then visit the parents and talk with them about the situation. This visit will go 100% better since you already know them and have visited before on a positive note.
ANSWER THE QUESTION
But all these little efforts will be futile if we are irrelevant and aren’t meeting the needs of the young people we’re ministering to.
It’s like this. Whenever I am training a group of youth speakers, I always remind them when they are speaking to a group of teenagers, they have about 30 seconds to answer the question that is on every kids’ mind: “Why should I listen to you!” We need to consider that question in any youth ministry venue. Name it: a bible study, a small group time, a large program, a fun event. Teenagers will ask themselves, “Why do I want to hang out with these people?”
So we better be ready to answer that question.
Look at Jesus’ model of ministry. As Jesus went around meeting people’s physical needs, that opened the door to meeting their spiritual needs. Jesus understood the needs of the people, and crowds couldn’t get enough of him.
Our ministry needs to be real, relevant…. and with today’s generation… it never hurts to be fun. We’ve all probably all witnessed a situation where the leaders were constantly, “Shhhhh! Be quiet! Come on!!!” In all actuality, if kids aren’t paying attention to us, then that might be an indication that our venue is boring or irrelevant.
Do you know the felt needs of the students in your community?
How can you provide those needs?
How do these opportunities open doors to meet their eternal needs?
When you can answer the big question in their life… you won’t usually have to worry about discipline problems.

IF YOU LIKED THIS ARTICLE FROM JONATHAN, YOU’LL ALSO LOVE HIS BOOKS  ABOUT RELATIONAL MINISTRY: CONNECT, AND DO THEY RUN WHEN THEY SEEING YOU COMING? OR THESE BOOKS FROM JONATHAN ABOUT PROGRAMMING: GETTING STUDENTS TO SHOW UP AND MINISTRY BY TEENAGERS

NYWC Lifetime Achievement Award - Tony Campolo

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Recently at NYWC Dallas, Tony Campolo was honored as the 2nd recipient of the Youth Specialties Lifetime Achievement Award for his legacy and substantial contributions to the thought, method, and practice of Modern youth ministery around the world.

Dr. Tony Campolo is professor emeritus of sociology at Eastern University, a former faculty member at the University of Pennsylvania, and the founder and president of the Evangelical Association for the Promotion of Education.  He has written more than 35 books, blogs regularly at his website, redletterchristians.org, and can also be found on both Facebook and Twitter.  Dr. Campolo and his wife Peggy live near Philadelphia and have two children and four grandchildren.

We’re Thankful For Youthworkers

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We caught Mark, Kara, and Doug right after NYWC 2012 to talk about our gratitude and thanks for youth workers who passionately give their lives  to youth ministry. 

 

Nipping at Narcissism

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Our culture seems to really buy into the "life is all about me" mentality. They think they are entitled to every latest gadget or bit of technology, the most recent clothes, all of the peripherals, a freedom to do whatever they want and an attitude that screams "I am awesome!" to boot.

Now, we really can't place too much blame. These learned responses are largely because it is how our American culture teaches them to behave. A culture that we've helped shape.

Especially when you go back to my generation, the X'ers, you can plainly see the pimping of the whole "live your life the way you want" philosophy. There's nothing wrong with empowerment or a healthy self-identity. But there is a point where the line crosses from empowerment to a selfish sense of entitlement. Statements about this "me mentality" have become poster-graphics plastered all over social networks and are largely viewed as inspirational in nature. That's cool and all, but it bothers me a bit in context.

One of the most often and subtle ways that the enemy tries to influence followers of Christ is to make us believe that life is "all about us". Would you agree that there are a ton of slogan pics and quotes that seem to like lean towards this worldview? I think most post, share and "like" them because they feel empowering -- they make us feel good about ourselves. But maybe it's time to look at this from the other side of the coin, per se.

As believers, our life simply isn't our own. It's surrendered. And everything we do, every choice we make is under the banner of "What do You want me to do, God?" I understand that the world-at-large doesn't see through that lens and that's why they see all of the "me" statements as liberating. But I throw out caution because it is a world bent on pleasing themselves, looking at the opposite sex as objects and doing whatever feels best at the moment. That's the slippery slope I don't want to see us lose a generation to...

Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. “Anyone who intends to come with Me has to let Me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow Me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?Matthew 16-24-26 MSG

Download NWYC 2012 Theme: Wonder

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We love setting youth workers up for success, which is why each year we give away our convention themes, to be used and molded by youth workers in their ministries.

This year's theme "Wonder" is about discovering the awe and inspiration that made us want to do youth ministry in the first place. Check out the blog post here on NYWC.com to download videos, slides, and other theme resources for your ministry. 

After the Altar Call

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The youth leader just finished giving a powerful message about the necessity of teenagers turning from their sin and following Jesus. As the altar call is given, several students in the audience are compelled to act on the invitation.     

But too many times, at this crucial point, perfectly normal worship services turn into The Phantom of the Opera.

Making Mistakes

For the last 15 years, I’ve traveled the country speaking at churches, camps, and other events. Because I’m an evangelist at heart, I’ve shared the Gospel in just about every situation imaginable, with just about every type of crowd imaginable. Nothing amps me up like seeing young people respond to God during an altar call and commit their lives to following Jesus.

Consequently, there is nothing more frustrating to me than seeing one of those students fall between the cracks at such a pivotal moment because of missed opportunities and careless mistakes.

Unfortunately, there are many potential mistakes that can ruin an altar call and negatively affect a teenager’s decision to follow Christ. And though all of us have made these errors from time to time, the good news is, we don’t have to ever again! Here are the seven biggest mistakes youth ministry leaders make during altar calls…and a few simple ways to correct them.

Mistake #1: Let students stay in their seats.

I know this is going to sound old fashioned, but the first way to ruin an altar call is to let students remain in their seats during the time of commitment. Sure, we might ask them to “pray in their seats,” but what we’re really doing is allowing them to remain anonymous. If we don’t make them move, we can’t counsel them, pray with them, or follow up with them.

That’s not good.

Looking at Scripture, it appears as though Jesus’s version of an altar call was to say, “Follow Me.” Peter and Andrew weren’t allowed to stay in their fishing boats, nor was Matthew allowed to stay in his tax collecting booth. Jesus made His would-be followers actually move. We need to do the same. We can’t let them stay in their seats.

By the way, if they’re honest, some youth leaders will admit they don’t ask their students to actuallymove because they’re afraid no one will. They want to avoid the embarrassment of having no one respond, so they remove accountability. What these youth leaders really need to remove is their ego. Then they can preach boldly and biblically, trusting God for transformation.

Now that we’ve addressed the first way to ruin an altar call – not making people move– let’s look at the second best way to ruin an altar call: making people move to the wrong place.

Mistake #2: Make students do business with God in front of everybody.

As adults, we conduct financial business with our banker, privately. We do health checkups with our doctor, privately. (Thank God!) So why do we insist on making young people do their spiritual business with a youth leader, publically? This is the most important decision students will ever make, so why force them do it in front of a crowd. 

Just because we ask young people to move from their seats doesn’t mean we have to make them stand in front of the entire youth ministry as they process their emotions, their sin, and God’s call. If we want them to make an informed decision about following Jesus – and we do, don’t we?– then we need to give them the proper time and place to do so. At the front youth room, with dozens of eyes on them, with the band playing the fourth verse of I Surrender All, may not be the best place.    

Instead of making young people carry on such an important conversation in such a distracting environment, consider having them meet with counselors in the youth pastor’s office, or an adjacent room, or some other designated meeting space that can adequately handle the task of impacting eternity.   

Speaking of counselors….

Mistake #3: Only have a few counselors available.

It’s happened way too many times. The youth leader gives an invitation to follow Jesus, a group of students move to the designated area…and two counselors bravely wade into the sea of sinners. The youth pastor is then forced to say, “Alright, all you guys go with Bill. All you ladies go with Margaret.”

Those poor counselors are as outnumbered as King Leonidas at Thermopylae!

Why do so many youth ministries have so few counselors? Do they not understand the importance of well-trained counselors? Do they not expect God to actually stir young people’s hearts to repentance?

Regardless of their reasons, the results of having too few counselors are terrible. Young people won’t get the attention and help they need. Further, they’re forced to choose between being honest about their sin in front of the counselor and several other young people…or not sharing anything at all. 

Guess which one they usually pick.

This mistake is so easy to avoid. Prayerfully select enough men and women from your church so that students can have a meaningful, one-on-one conversation with someone of their same gender.

But you’re not out of the woods yet. There are other counselor-related mistakes that can ruin an altar call.

Mistake #4: Use untrained and unprepared counselors.

In trying to avoid mistake #3, some youth leaders use anybody they can get their hands on to counsel others. Any leader can do counseling, right?After all, they’ve sat through hundreds of altars calls. Plus, they even went through this experience once themselves! They should know the ropes by now…right?

 That’s a big assumption, and it carries big risks with it.

Of all the mistakes that ruin an altar call, the use of untrained and unprepared counselors may be the most frequent. Teachers must be trained in order to lead a class. Military personnel must be trained in order to lead their troops. Why shouldn’t a counselor be trained to lead a person to Christ!? Here are just a few of the important points on which your counselors need to be crystal clear 

1.     Do the counselors know where to stand, when to approach teenagers, and where to take them?

2.     Do the counselors know what to say (and not say)? Can they clearly explain God’s plan of salvation?

3.     Do the counselors know the importance of confidentiality? Likewise, do they know when to refer a student to a professional?

4.     Do the counselors have the necessary tools for the task? Counselors will need their Bibles, of course, but it wouldn’t hurt to have extra copies of God’s Word to give to kids who do not have one. Counselors will also need forms to collect contact information for follow up purposes. Further, they should provide young people with information about the youth ministry (and church), including a way to contact the counselor and the youth pastor. And it doesn’t hurt for counselors to have breath mints, too! 

 By the way, the best tactic for training a counselor is to partner him/her with someone who’s already a great counselor. Let the counselor-in-training silently observe the mentor as he/she counsels young people after an altar call. Just make sure the mentoring counselor gets a chance to debrief the situation with the counselor-in-training after everything is said and done.

 These efforts will ensure that when teens decide to give their lives to God, they can have access to well-trained counselors.

Mistake #5: Use counselors who talk too much.

Humans have two ears and one mouth, but hardly anyone uses them proportionately…including many counselors. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve observed counselors preaching to the people sitting in front of them after an altar call.

Didn’t they just hear a sermon? Do they really need another one so soon?

Some counselors think it’s important to share every passage of Scripture on the topic of salvation with kids who don’t even understand the concept yet. I hear them say, “Now let’s turn to Ephesians 2:8-9,” but the poor teenager is still looking for Romans 1:16, the last passage referenced. 

Other counselors feel it’s crucial to communicate every theological thought they have in their mental database. I’ve overheard counselors lecturing young people about various atonement theories, the cosmological argument for the existence of God, and even the Levitical system of animal sacrifice! (Ummm…sadly, that’s not a joke.) Meanwhile, the young person who wants to accept Christ just sits there with a confused look on their face.

Yes, counselors need to be able to articulate biblical truth. But they must remember that truth is meant to be life-changing, not overwhelming! Instead of talking so much, counselors should be trained to ask really good questions that lead to the Gospel. Here are the questions I always tell my counselors to ask:

1.     What’s your name? (Yep, this is a big one! Young people are usually reluctant to take advice from someone who doesn’t even know their name, so take the time to ask this important question.

2.     What made you respond to the message?

3.     What is your biggest struggle right now?

4.     Can I share something with you that will be a big help?

Question number four brings you to the Gospel, which helps counselors avoid this next mistake…

Mistake #6: Focus on the symptom instead of the Savior.

I saw it happen just last week in a church I was speaking at up North. One of the young men that had responded to the message I preached from Psalm 20 was partnered with a (young) counselor. The two of them were engaged in a serious conversation in the counseling room when I walked in a few minutes later. I quietly sat down beside them, and silently listened as the counselor tried to help the young man with his addiction to pornography.

The counselor talked on and on about the best ways to overcome this destructive addiction: get accountability, download filtering software, read the Bible, ask for God’s help, etc. All of it was good advice. Then the counselor stood up to leave; he’d said all that could be said about porn.

But he’d said nothing about the Savior!!!

Acting quickly, I asked if I could pose a few questions to the young man. I was given his permission, so I cut right to the chase and asked him about his relationship with Jesus. Did he have one? How did he know? What was the quality of that relationship? How was the sin of pornography affecting that relationship? What was his plan in dealing with that sin?  

Sadly, it was the first time this young man had been asked about Jesus. I spent a few minutes asking him more questions about Jesus, and then prayed with him. When he left the room a little while later, fully assured of his relationship with Jesus, I nonchalantly held the young counselor back 

I gently pointed out to him that he focused only on pornography and never once got around to offering Jesus’ forgiveness of that sin. I reminded him that the young man’s ultimate problem wasn’t pornography; it was his sinful nature! “Think about it,” I said. “Suppose he actually breaks the chains of bondage that porn has him in. Terrific! But he’s still in debt to God for his lust, not to mention his various acts of sexual immorality. He’ll still be guilty before God. That’s the reality we must focus on first!”

Too often, counselors start off their conversations by focusing on the symptoms instead of the Savior. They discuss every form of sinfulness – anger, lust, lying, gossip, unforgiveness – but run out of time (or breath) before talking about the Savior and His cure for our sin.

 Don’t let your counselors get sidetracked from their main task of helping people respond to Jesus. Make sure they focus their conversations on the Savior, not the symptoms.

The four questions I provided above will help counselors not get stuck on the symptoms. Once they share why they came forward and what they’re struggling with, we need to introduce them to the one who can help them through these struggles.

 

Mistake #7: Pray FOR them instead of WITH them.

“Just repeat after me: Dear Jesus….”

 I should probably state at this point that I vehemently hate the “sinner’s prayer.” I know that it’s been used for decades, but the practice has its drawbacks, nonetheless.  

Tell me something. If Jesus truly wants a personal relationship with us, then why do we need someone else telling us what to say to Him? And given that so many Christians, counselors included, view the prayer as a formula for salvation, it’s no surprise that doubt ensues afterward over whether or not the right words were used.

When the time comes for a young person to pray to receive Christ, why not let them use their own words? (What a concept, huh?) You might have to guide them along a little bit, but if we pray with them instead of for them, they will never look back on their salvation moment and realize that it was someone else’s words they used instead of their own.

Some very simple guidance is usually sufficient; they need to confess their sins and ask for God’s forgiveness, committing to walk with Jesus for the rest of their lives. Then, after taking a moment to show them the confidence Jesus had in our Heavenly Father hearing our prayers (John 11:41-42), give them a chance to pray from THEIR hearts.

They may mess up words, but they can’t mess up heart. 

 Getting It Right

As youth leaders, we have lots of great reasons to correct these mistakes when it comes to giving an altar call. For starters, Jesus deserves our very best, and so do those that listen to us. Furthermore, these mistakes are too easy to fix, so there are no excuses for tolerating them. Finally, too much goes into our preaching and teaching to have it derailed at the last, and most important, moment.

Let’s remember that eternity is on the line. That alone is reason enough to get it right.

 

 

David R. Smith, co-author of Ministry by Teenagers, is a 15-year youth ministry veteran who writes for TheSource4YM.com and speaks across the country. David specializes in sharing the gospel, and equipping others do the same. He provides free resources to anyone who works with teenagers on his website, DavidRSmith.org. David resides with his wife and son in Tampa, Flo

Volunteer Reflections for Youth Pastors

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The letter below, an excerpt from the new book Letters to a Youth Worker, is used with permission from the Center for Youth Ministry Training. 


To my Dearest Sojourner in Ministry to Youth,

You are wise, my friend, to seek out and learn from the experience of others, others who have been educated with an often painful curriculum. And so, as one who has had the privilege of walking with many who have suffered their way into wisdom in youth ministry, I offer a few words of foolishness for you to consider.

I have been in youth ministry for over two decades now, but my experience has been much different than your journey will likely be. You see, I’ve never been on staff at a church. I didn’t really even want to be a youthworker! (In case you’re ready to stop reading right now, I should add that I have been a volunteer in our church’s youth ministry for most of the last 21 years, giving me the chance to work with five different youth pastors!).

The truth is that, as much as I might have been attracted to taking a position as a youth pastor, I resisted it. I’m embarrassed to tell you why. It came down to this…

I didn’t want to drive a bus.

I know it sounds ridiculous, but it’s true. Every youth pastor I knew had driven a rickety old bus up the winding roads of the mountains of California, nearly slipping off the edge (or so I imagined), with a bunch of loud, obnoxious teens yelling at the top of their lungs.

Besides that, I hate driving, and driving a bus was something I just would not do. Fortunately for you, with all the changes in legal and insurance matters, you may never have the option of driving a bus. But for me, it was the deal breaker.

But in God’s unpredictable choreography, a door opened for me to be involved in youth ministry from a different angle. So I began supporting youthworkers in the church by developing content and events to help students follow Jesus by helping them grow in biblical wisdom. This role led me to travel the country to hundreds of youth groups each year, and I began to see patterns in the lives of youth pastors that I hope can help you succeed in your ministry.

Invite People to Be Constructively Critical

Be careful not to rest in the positive praise of others. Know this: Church people will not always be honest with you. Some will praise you for the great job you’re doing and then give a very different evaluation to others. Too many youth pastors are dumfounded when problems arise that they never saw coming.

Being a youthworker can be incredibly challenging and relationally complex. You have to balance the expectations of the teens you are shepherding, their parents, church leadership, and scores of others who aren’t even remotely impacted by your decisions, but who nonetheless have an opinion.

Confrontation is hard, and many in the church don’t know how to speak honestly. By asking for critical input, we foster the fruit of humility and can see more clearly the changes needed in areas we might be blind to. Those who don’t ask for (or who resist) critical input, will very likely find themselves suddenly ambushed by conflict much larger than it should ever have been.

This pattern leads to blaming others, often the pastor, whom we can easily assume is simply intimidated or threatened by our talent. This stance has a way of increasing our wounded-ness, sending us to our next ministry post damaged, doomed to repeat the same mistakes all over again.

Should church leadership manage better? Of course. But we can’t control them. What we can do is take responsibility for our own lives. So I hope you’ll live into the advice in Proverbs to seek out wise counsel, even if that counsel comes in the form of a “wound from a friend.”

Invest in Learning

Is it possible that the staggeringly high turnover rates among those working with youth may be rooted in the fact that after a few years, we just don’t have anything fresh to offer?

When I was in college I made a little extra money doing magic shows. I’d been doing this type of thing since I was young, so I had invested a lot of time developing a great 45-minute program. It wasn’t long before I was spending much more time performing that same 45-minute show than I was practicing or experimenting with new ideas.

This approach served me well for several years. I was able to actually make a decent living during my first few years out of college doing little more than this 45-minute program. Then the problem came: People started inviting me to return. And I didn’t have new material to offer them.

And when I did create new material, it wasn’t anywhere as polished as what I’d been doing for the majority of my life. That’s when I learned how to balance my time between “exploring” and “exploiting,” a concept I shared with the Skit Guys early on in their career, which they have more than mastered.

We all have to find time to do both exploring and exploiting. If we are always exploring (learning new stuff), we never put anything in to action (exploiting what we have learned). And if we are always exploiting what we already know, we never learn anything new. Read books, chase down mentors, go to conventions (like Youth Specialties National Youth Workers Convention!), and make a priority of listening to voices that aren’t just like yours. Find this balance, and you will have longevity in ministry, always be adding to and updating the tools in your toolbox.

Don’t Be the Center

In all my visits to churches, I observed that the youthworkers who were most consistently developing Christ followers and servant leaders, who were experiencing longevity and health in their personal lives and ministries, had one thing in common: None of them was the central player in their ministries! They had students in leadership, and they had spent great amounts of time recruiting and investing in the lives of their adult leaders.

I’ve learned this fascinating fact about pianos (hang with me here): If you shout into a piano, the only strings that will vibrate are those with the same frequency as your voice. Your talent and personality will only connect with so many in the group. The sooner we realize this limitation, the sooner we’ll get passionate about finding a diverse group of leaders who can share in the ministry: more voices calling out, more students vibrating to more frequencies.

Volunteers are good for more than doing the work you don’t want to do. Find those who have teaching gifts and gifts of discipling youth. Help develop them, knowing that few of them will naturally be ready to step outside the box of seeing their role as little more than your “helper.”

When my youth pastors have helped me be successful as a volunteer, I want to stay in the game. When they have valued my time by being prepared and communicating expectations clearly, I want to show up. Don’t be the center. Make others successful, and you’ll accomplish so much more.

There are so many other insights I’d love to share with you, having observed so many extraordinary youthworkers over the years, but these few thoughts will give you plenty to work on for your next few years. More later.

May our Lord richly bless all that you have and will sacrifice to help this generation follow in the way of Jesus!

Mark Matlock

Questions to Ponder:
1. What loyal opponents do you have in your life whom you trust to speak the truth to you, even when you might not want to hear it?
2. What did you do last year to learn more, to be more equipped to do the work you do more effectively? What do you plan to do in the coming year?

This letter is from the book Letters to a Youth Worker, edited by Mark DeVries.


Save 12% Plus Free Shipping on 12/12/12

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We are celebrating the most incredible day of 2012 with 12% off any item in the store! From Curriculum, to books for students, or NYWC media downloads. Simply enter twelve at check out to grab your savings plus FREE shipping! Good for today only (That's 12/12/12)!

Are You Going to Student Leadership Conference? Great Early Bird Offer!

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 Take a look around your student ministry and ask yourself,

“Who is ready for Student Leadership Conference 2013?”

SLC is a conference designed to train your teenagers to better understand their role as leaders in your ministry. Over the last several years, we’ve learned that this conference isn’t for everyone in your group, but it is perfect for those who are READY! You’ve got some students who are ready to follow Jesus and impact their school, family, community and church. At SLC we’ll help them discover their gifts, explore their passion, and develop their potential leadership within their youth group.

Last summer, Doug Fields, Mark Matlock, Kara Powell, Walt Muller, Greg Stier and several other youth ministry thought-leaders gave of their hearts and minds to over 1000 student leaders. This summer, we’ll have more youth ministry veterans as we expand to three locations and continue our tradition of learning and serving in an innovative, experiential and collaborative manner.

Come and find out why so many youth workers are saying Student Leadership Conference has changed their youth ministry!

Visit the SLC 2013 site

Are You Going to Student Leadership Conference? Great Early Bird Offer!

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 Take a look around your student ministry and ask yourself,

“Who is ready for Student Leadership Conference 2013?”

SLC is a conference designed to train your teenagers to better understand their role as leaders in your ministry. Over the last several years, we’ve learned that this conference isn’t for everyone in your group, but it is perfect for those who are READY! You’ve got some students who are ready to follow Jesus and impact their school, family, community and church. At SLC we’ll help them discover their gifts, explore their passion, and develop their potential leadership within their youth group.

Last summer, Doug Fields, Mark Matlock, Kara Powell, Walt Muller, Greg Stier and several other youth ministry thought-leaders gave of their hearts and minds to over 1000 student leaders. This summer, we’ll have more youth ministry veterans as we expand to three locations and continue our tradition of learning and serving in an innovative, experiential and collaborative manner.

Come and find out why so many youth workers are saying Student Leadership Conference has changed their youth ministry!

Visit the SLC 2013 site

Character of Christmas: Mary

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In this series we will focus on characters from the Nativity and draw out character qualities we can model and implement into our daily lives.

Apart from Jesus, Mary is central to the story of Christmas. Not only does she play an important role but she exhibited great moral character. Take a few minutes to ponder the passage and consider what character qualities you find in her from the reading.

Passage: Luke 1:26-38
26 In the sixth month, the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a town in Galilee called Nazareth, 27 to a virgin engaged to a man named Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin?s name was Mary. 28 And the angel came to her and said, "Rejoice, favored woman! The Lord is with you." 29 But she was deeply troubled by this statement, wondering what kind of greeting this could be. 30 Then the angel told her:

Do not be afraid, Mary,
for you have found favor with God.
31 Now listen:
You will conceive and give birth to a son,
and you will call His name Jesus.
32 He will be great
and will be called the Son of the Most High,
and the Lord God will give Him
the throne of His father David.
33 He will reign over the house of Jacob forever,
and His kingdom will have no end.

34 Mary asked the angel, "How can this be, since I have not been intimate with a man?"

35 The angel replied to her:

"The Holy Spirit will come upon you,
and the power of the Most High will overshadow you.
Therefore, the holy One to be born
will be called the Son of God.

36 And consider your relative Elizabeth?even she has conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called childless. 37 For nothing will be impossible with God.

38 I am the Lord's slave,said Mary. May it be done to me according to your word.Then the angel left her.

Character Quality #1: Moral Integrity
Mary was a single young girl pledged to be married. Many believe she would have been between the age of 12-14 years old when she was given this enormous task and privilege of bearing the son of God. She had been chosen and was greatly used of God in impacting all of humanity. During the time of Jesus and even today, woman can be slighted, taken advantage of, and maltreated within the home and workplace. Women have not had an easy road.

Our current society has often sexualized women, making them objects to obtain through lust. Young women today have much to overcome in their representation of themselves to men much less our society that values looks over character and appearance over depth. Mary is certainly a model for all young ladies and women alike. Moreover, everyone can learn a few lessons from Mary.

1) Mary was taking the proper channels to be married. She was engaged for a period of time.
In our day and age, it's nothing for people to be involved in all kinds of improper relationships. From shacking up to multiple illicit relationships, our moral character leaves much to be desired! Mary and Joseph alike, demonstrate to us that it?s important to take the proper paths to developing interpersonal relationships with one another. Take your time in dating people. Don?t allow the relationship to diminish into something that is just "physical". Honor the person you are with and be honorable within your relationship. Build trust with each other, which was a huge thing for Mary and Joseph to have after hearing such news! Their love and trust in God and each other allowed them to bear this burden together!

2) Mary was a virgin. She had some boundaries in her life.
Again, this is very tough to live out, especially when the word "virgin" has such a negative connotation. However, one of the facts that she was given such an honor was because she was a virgin! Don't get me wrong, people who are not virgins can still be greatly used of God and God most certainly forgives sins of a sexual nature. Yet Mary stands tall among women and all Humanity as someone unashamed because she had kept herself pure. All of us have areas of our lives in which we struggle and the area of sex can most certainly be delicate to deal with to say the least. But one thing is for sure, someone who keeps themselves pure and clean sexually will have nothing to fear. It's better to be ridiculed and live without fear than to yield one's body and live in regret. Follow Mary's lead and set boundaries. Remain a virgin until God sends the right person to you and you become married. You won't regret it! Don't be afraid or ashamed to be called a virgin? It's a title not many people can wear and an attribute that many wish they could bear.

To wrap up this character quality think about these things:
How do you need to give your "dating" life to God?
In what ways have you been compromising your morals and values?
How does what you watch or listen to depict relationships between men and women? Does it reflect God's view of how we should live and treat one another?
What boundaries do you need to establish to remain clean, pure and healthy in your relationships?
If God was going to choose you to bear His son to the world, what would you feel compelled to say? Would you take it as an honor, burden, or privilege?
In what ways can having a moral code or ethic set you apart from others? Would you be embarrassed to be called a virgin?

To read the entire series, visit Vision2Hear.

Would You LIke to Host a YS UnConference?

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Let me start by saying…I love the events we do at YS. I think YS, as a big tent, convenes the best and most diverse group of youth workers who share a passion for helping teenagers follow in the way of Jesus.

But if you’re like me when I go to a conventions or conferences some of the best moments are not the general sessions and seminars. Often I find energy at a convention to be the “in between” spaces like meals and breaks when paths cross and spontaneous meetings happen. Like, during a coffee break, that’s when the sparks fly!

How about an event that has “coffee break” energy?
A YS UnConference is designed around collaboration, discussion and relationships. It isn’t about lectures or training but rather about learning from each other, identifying and solving problems we share in the field of youth ministry. Rather than a person or committee planning the direction of the event from the top down, the event “self organizes” from the bottom up. The experts at a YS UnConference are the attendees (and yes, if you are doing youth ministry in any context, you are an “expert in the field”).

Sound good so far? Interested in hosting a 1-day event?
We have a limited number of weeks this Spring 2013 for me to facilitate 10 YS “UnConferences” across the US. There would be no cost to the host(s), just provide the space and some help organizing during the day.

If there is a group of three or so youth workers who would like to host an event, here is what you need to do:
1.) Form a hosting team of at least two other youth workers in your area
2.) Fill out the request form with your rationale and desire for doing the event

We'd like to find locations in the following metro areas:  (we're a distributed team, so we think in terms of Time Zones)

Left Coast
Seattle/Portland
Sacramento
Los Angeles
Phoenix

Middle Earth
Denver
Kansas City
Memphis/Nashville
Birmingham
Louisville
Indianapolis
Cincinnati/Columbus
Chicago
Minneapolis
Pittsburgh

Right Coast
Boston
New York
Philadelphia
Charlotte/Charleston
Atlanta
Orlando

Yes, I'm interested in hosting an YS UnConference!

The Best of the Best 2012

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Each year Youth Specialties resources 100,000's of youth workers through events, online content, hours of video teaching, and hundreds of hours of free content. Our tribe of youth workers is diverse, from para-church organizations to mega churches, across hundreds of denominational distinctives, to various age-focused ministries around the world. This diversity helps incredible content rise to the top of the stack.

We know as you exit 2012 many have levels of uncertanty, the first rest (after Christmas Services) you have had in a long time. Its our prayer that these resources equip you to meet 2013 with an army of voices, experts, strategists, veterens, and pastors cheering you on. 

The Top Most Viewed, Shared, and Downloaded Resources of 2012

  1. Today’s Lazy Youth Pastor - Jonathan Mckee
  2. How Can I Find a New Church: Sticky Faith Teen Curriculum Free Sample - Kara Powel, Brad Griffin
  3. 12 Free Games - Youth Specialties 
  4. Seven Ways to Connect with Teenagers this Summer - Jonathan Mckee
  5. The Perfect Youth Ministry Volunteer -  Chris Dortch

But that's not all! The Top 5 Resources from the YS SHOP in 2012 included:

  1. HELP! I am a Small Group Leader - Laurie Polich
  2. Studies On The Go, John - Laurie Polich
  3. Me I Want To Be (Teen Edition) - John Ortberg
  4. Sticky Faith - Kara Powel, Chap Clark
  5. Why Not Now? - Mark Matlock

The TOP FREEBIE of 2012:

Adventures of the Youth Group Van - Christina Robertson

 

The Best of the Best 2012

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Each year Youth Specialties resources 100,000's of youth workers through events, online content, hours of video teaching, and hundreds of hours of free content. Our tribe of youth workers is diverse, from para-church organizations to mega churches, across hundreds of denominational distinctives, to various age-focused ministries around the world. This diversity helps incredible content rise to the top of the stack.

We know as you exit 2012 many have levels of uncertanty, the first rest (after Christmas Services) you have had in a long time. Its our prayer that these resources equip you to meet 2013 with an army of voices, experts, strategists, veterens, and pastors cheering you on. 

The Top Most Viewed, Shared, and Downloaded Resources of 2012

  1. Today’s Lazy Youth Pastor - Jonathan Mckee
  2. How Can I Find a New Church: Sticky Faith Teen Curriculum Free Sample - Kara Powel, Brad Griffin
  3. 12 Free Games - Youth Specialties 
  4. Seven Ways to Connect with Teenagers this Summer - Jonathan Mckee
  5. The Perfect Youth Ministry Volunteer -  Chris Dortch

But that's not all! The Top 5 Resources from the YS SHOP in 2012 included:

  1. HELP! I am a Small Group Leader - Laurie Polich
  2. Studies On The Go, John - Laurie Polich
  3. Me I Want To Be (Teen Edition) - John Ortberg
  4. Sticky Faith - Kara Powel, Chap Clark
  5. Why Not Now? - Mark Matlock

The TOP FREEBIE of 2012:

Adventures of the Youth Group Van


NYWC 2012 Wrap Up: Let the Evals Speak!

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This year like many others the post evaluations for NYWC were filled with praise and great stories. But that’s what I expect to read, that’s what we intended to accomplish. All in all it’s been a great year for the conventions and we have much more to learn.  It is always a pleasure to read how the gatherings we’ve produced have ministered to youth workers and enhanced the work you do.  Here are some significant trends:

Family Room
It is interesting that a few people thought family room was created to save money. Nothing could be further from the truth, in fact, it required more resources to do them than a Big Room.  
Overall, there is an appreciation for the risk that we took to bring youth workers together to make the conference smaller and to give participants the ability to connect with others like them.

Some were absolutely angry that we kind of “forced” them on them by not offering other options so they could escape the awkwardness of meeting new people. Many thanked us for forcing them into this environment,saying that on their own, they wouldn’t have participated but Family Room turned out to be the best part of their weekend. But for the smaller numbers who didn’t like this new experience, they really didn’t like it.

We believe in the incredible things that can happen when we come together to learn and share. We aren’t going to give up on Family Room, there are too many positive experiences, but we are listening and learning to what everyone had to say as we move forward. We want to keep investing in and improving this experience.

For sure, a Family Room experience will be shorter. Even those that loved the Family Room felt we could condense the amount of time. We also will not have them meet Sunday, as too many people’s schedules make committing to a third gathering difficult.

This will also allow us to add back the Saturday morning general session (and we have a great line up of speakers taking shape for 2013!).

Theological Forums
We were excited to see attendance double over last year. Youth Ministry is taking a theological turn and YS will continue to be a convener and participant in the theological discussion around youth ministry.

We realize the Theological Forums are growing up and may need some format tweaks. We’ve been experimenting with this track and will be working this year to create an improved experience with all the feedback we’ve received.

We also want to ensure we are providing a balance across the theological spectrum. The Theological Forums are not intended to be “debates” but a discussion about how various theological positions inform and influence the direction of our practice in youth ministry.

Seminars
We always offer a wide variety of seminars from the diverse spectrum of youth workers reflected in our family. As one professor of a very conservative seminary told me,  “the tension in Christian higher Ed is between whether we are educating or indoctrinating.” He comes to NYWC for the breadth of backgrounds people have to be stretched and exposed too.

That said, we are always looking for new seminars and leaders. If you or someone you know would like to offer a seminar for NYWC 2013, you can submit a proposal HERE.  As you can appreciate we have hundreds of seminar proposals, we’d like to give everyone the opportunity, but we’d love to consider any ideas or experiences you have.


There are many other ideas we’ll be implementing and considering off the evals that I don’t have room to mention here, but we are looking to serve you in 2013 with the largest, most diverse youth ministry gathering in the nation. Please make plans to join us in San Diego or Nashville next fall. We’ll get more information to you as it becomes available.

Have a Merry Christmas and we will see you in the New Year!

Would You Like to Host a YS UnConference?

$
0
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Let me start by saying…I love the events we do at YS. I think YS, as a big tent, convenes the best and most diverse group of youth workers who share a passion for helping teenagers follow in the way of Jesus.

But if you’re like me when I go to a conventions or conferences some of the best moments are not the general sessions and seminars. Often I find energy at a convention to be the “in between” spaces like meals and breaks when paths cross and spontaneous meetings happen. Like, during a coffee break, that’s when the sparks fly!

How about an event that has “coffee break” energy?
A YS UnConference is designed around collaboration, discussion and relationships. It isn’t about lectures or training but rather about learning from each other, identifying and solving problems we share in the field of youth ministry. Rather than a person or committee planning the direction of the event from the top down, the event “self organizes” from the bottom up. The experts at a YS UnConference are the attendees (and yes, if you are doing youth ministry in any context, you are an “expert in the field”).

Sound good so far? Interested in hosting a 1-day event?
We have a limited number of weeks this Spring 2013 for me to facilitate 10 YS “UnConferences” across the US. There would be no cost to the host(s), just provide the space and some help organizing during the day.

If there is a group of three or so youth workers who would like to host an event, here is what you need to do:
1.) Form a hosting team of at least two other youth workers in your area
2.) Fill out the request form with your rationale and desire for doing the event

We'd like to find locations in the following metro areas:  (we're a distributed team, so we think in terms of Time Zones)

Left Coast
Seattle/Portland
Sacramento
Los Angeles
Phoenix

Middle Earth
Denver
Kansas City
Memphis/Nashville
Birmingham
Louisville
Indianapolis
Cincinnati/Columbus
Chicago
Minneapolis
Pittsburgh

Right Coast
Boston
New York
Philadelphia
Charlotte/Charleston
Atlanta
Orlando

Yes, I'm interested in hosting an YS UnConference!

Meet the Digital Age at PlanetWisdom

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Meet The Digital Age,
2012, a year commonly associated with endings, saw a new beginning for former members of the David Crowder *Band. On the heels of their final project with the DC*B, “Give Us Rest or (A Requiem Mass In C [The Happiest of All Keys])”, Mark, Mike D, Bwack, and Jack sought to continue writing, performing, and producing music together for the Church. Out of this desire, The Digital Age was born.

The idea of The Digital Age came from several conversations about the current state of technology and how we as humans can now interact. With the rise of the internet, our neighbors are no longer the people who live next to us. We have relationships with people not only within our communities and in our cities, but across the globe. Ideas and information spread quickly and shape how we choose to connect or disconnect from those around us. For example, the majority of the final DC*B album was recorded in separate locations. Files were uploaded and shared on a private server, and many artistic interactions occurred behind the veil of a computer screen. 1s and 0s turned into sounds, and sounds turned into songs. What started as small files are now songs that can be found floating across the internet. We are all neighbors. We are all connected. Art is everywhere, free to give and take. We live in the digital age.

You can hear them live at PlanetWisdom Orange County, Tulsa, and Bay Area events, today is the last day to lock-in incredible savings on tickets! (Save up to $10 if you register today)

Meet the Digital Age at PlanetWisdom

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Meet The Digital Age,
2012, a year commonly associated with endings, saw a new beginning for former members of the David Crowder *Band. On the heels of their final project with the DC*B, “Give Us Rest or (A Requiem Mass In C [The Happiest of All Keys])”, Mark, Mike D, Bwack, and Jack sought to continue writing, performing, and producing music together for the Church. Out of this desire, The Digital Age was born.

The idea of The Digital Age came from several conversations about the current state of technology and how we as humans can now interact. With the rise of the internet, our neighbors are no longer the people who live next to us. We have relationships with people not only within our communities and in our cities, but across the globe. Ideas and information spread quickly and shape how we choose to connect or disconnect from those around us. For example, the majority of the final DC*B album was recorded in separate locations. Files were uploaded and shared on a private server, and many artistic interactions occurred behind the veil of a computer screen. 1s and 0s turned into sounds, and sounds turned into songs. What started as small files are now songs that can be found floating across the internet. We are all neighbors. We are all connected. Art is everywhere, free to give and take. We live in the digital age.

You can hear them live at PlanetWisdom Orange County, Tulsa, and Bay Area events, today is the last day to lock-in incredible savings on tickets! (Save up to $10 if you register today)

Youth Worker Stories: Tobias

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Tobias Haglund shares his story of working with Young Life Capernaum, a ministry that specializes in serving students with special needs.

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